Ok - so i know we're supposed to have a mummy-sisterhood, and we shouldnt pass judgement on other mummies for what they do or dont do. But i'm gonna, right here, right now, because its been bugging me all week.
I know two lovely women who were both blessed with brand new bubbas this week just gone - one on April 1st and one on April 2nd. Their precious little bundles couldnt be more different - one a boy, almost 9lb, the other a girl, only 3 ounces over 5lb - and neither could the mummas, but they've both done something in the first few days of their babies lives that has had me shaking my head and mumbling " Wha? ". Annoyance #1: the first woman had a baby that took straight to the boob. Her breastfeeding chart in hospital was full of rankings of 4 and 5's ( attached and feeding really well ). Within two days of going home however she had taken him off the breast and put him on to formula, saying that her breasts were too small for him to get milk out off. Which could be true, except the hospital chart would say otherwise, and those who know her best think she's decided to go onto formula because she's too lazy to get up in the night and breastfeed. What?!? That may or not be true, but it if it is i find it greatly annoying ( and i'd be a trifle disgusted in it ). My Flynn found it difficult to attach in the first week or so - in fact we stayed in hospital an extra day and a half just so i was confident that i'd be able to feed him something - and we still feed with the aid of a nipple shield. It hasnt been a nightmare, but nor has been an easy ride ( or entirely convenient ). But i do it because its the best thing for him, and i love him enough to be slightly inconvenienced and tired. And Lady#1 gives up within two days, on a bubba who was a natural to the boob, because she's too lazy? And not only that but straight onto the formula and feeding a 3 day old 60ml at each feed - without consulting a doctor, a midwife, and LAC, not even a chemist. I'm no expert, but that just doesnt seem right. And that lack of loving attention and wanting to do whats best just got up my nose.
Annoyance #2: i know there is HUUUUUUGE debate about SAHM vs working mums. Frankly i would love to not have to go back to work in October but i dont think our finances will allow for it. Working mums are awesome and i have no beef with them. However, i draw the line at returning to work before your baby is a week old. Especially when she is so tiny ( smaller than a Cabbage Patch doll, wearing 000 000 sized clothes ). And especially when you own the business so there is no narky old boss pressuring you to return. Surely someone els can do the spreadsheet for the wages, answer the phone and help a handful of clients for a week or two? She is taking the bubba to work with her ( and her 2 year old son ) but how she expects to get work done and be able to give appropriate attention to the kids is beyond me.
And so - rant over. I know i'm a first time mum and my son is only 3 and half months old so i'm by no means an expert .... but thats just how i feel. You can call me out for ignoring the sacred bonds of motherhood if you want, but we all have our opinions. Of course, its not my place to share these opinons with either of these ladies so i had to get it off my chest somewhere.....