A Brief Photo Essay

And so, you loyal reader type people came through with some ideas. I've considered them all ( thanks for the whole Israel v Gaza thing Dash, i might have to jump on Wikipedia before i tackle that one.... ), but i thought this might be the easiest, and most fun, for a Sunday afternoon. A few of you said " hey, stories from your childhood " and of course you wanted accompanying pictures - plus, this is my official entry into Andy's photo challenge. And so, please enjoy a few photos of yours truely, accompanied by a short commentary on each shot:

Firstly, yes thats me as a cute, chubby little baby. And, yes, you're eyes are not deceiving you - i am wearing a baby bikini. ( Also, this is as close to naked as you will ever get to see me, so enjoy it while you can. Or, actually, dont enjoy it - enjoying it would be wrong... ). I believe i'm almost a year old in this photo, playing in a blow up pool in my Nan's backyard. Dont ask me what those green things floating around me are - i dont exactly remember - but i'm pretty sure they must have been fun to play with.

On to Picture #2 - thats me on my first day of school, 5 years old. All together now - awwwww. Its sometime in late January of 1989 ( yes, Northern hemisphereans, we start school at the start of the calendar year, not in the middle ). Please take note of my awesome, late 80's fashioned, school uniform - a sad green pinafore, white cotton blouse and little knee socks ( that dont quite come up to my knees ). Also, please notice that I am completely rocking a mullet. Yes, a MULLET. Business in the front, party at the back. To this day, i cannot believe that my mother willfully did that to my head. The missing teeth at the front though are all my fault - they came out while i was eating an apple.

Check me out - that is me, and my new bike, circa around 7 years of age. My dad and my pa made me that bike - yes, you read that right, they MADE it out of second hand bike parts, instead of buying me and my brother a new bike each (we werent dirt poor, but neither could we afford two brand new bikes ). My bike rocked - i chose what colour i wanted, i put cool stickers on it, and you better believed my brother and ruled the neighbourhood on them. We had a group of around 6 or 7 kids in our street and we'd ride around on weekends playing " bike-tag " or we'd ride down to the Death Track. Oooh - sounds dangerous, doesnt it ? Kind-of, sort-of, but not really. It was basically this huge hill of dirt ( maybe 2 storeys high ) on some land owned by the NSW Railway. Some older kids had made a walking track to the top and then a long, bumpy, dipping track to ride down. Woo hoo! I'm proud to say i never suffered a single injury there. My brother, however, did take one memorable spill which saw him fall into a patch of weeds and end up with a whole patch of thistles in his butt....

Picture #4 - this one is especially for you Andy. Anybody who reads Andy's page will recognise that he and I may have in fact owned the same pair of glasses as youngsters. Those things are freakin' huge! Again, I have my mother to blame for my complete lack of style ( an affliction I am to do this day trying to overcome ). In case you wondered what the hell is going on this picture let me explain - i am in my PJ's and I am apparently trying to kill my younger brother ( the little kid in the blue PJ's with the pained expression on his face ). And i'm smiling because jumping on your younger brother and trying to squash the guts out of him is fun. Right ? Right ?

And lasty but not leastly, Picture #5 - me before my Year 12 Formal ( read: Senior Prom ). This one isnt exactly in the humiliating category, but i thought i'd share it anyways. Please bear in mind when looking at this picture that i have lost aprroximately 17ish kgs between then and now ( i've changed from a size 16/ US size 12 down to a size 10/ US size 6 ). I think if i had my time again i wouldnt have picked that dress. It was a velvet dress with spaghetti cross over straps and, looking back, it didnt really fit all that well. I could have found something so much more flattering. As it stands though it wasnt all that bad - definately a more timelessly chic choice than some of my friends....