... its off to work i go! Oh yes, tomorrow will be my first day back at work after 11 months of maternity leave. I am about 10% looking forward to it and 90% not wanting it to happen.
I dont want to leave my Flynny.
I dont want to miss his first steps ( seriously, i reckon he's a month away from walking.. )
I dont want him to get upset because i'm not there with him.
I dont want to go back to work and have to re-learn all the crap i've forgotten since i left ( i think i'm going to have to read the manual that I wrote for my co-workers last year! )
I dont want to have to deal with the state manager that i just cannot stand.
I dont want to deal with rude and obnoxious customers when i could be spending quality time with my son.
But, most of all, i dont want to be broke....and thats why i'm going back to work. 3 days, 9am-5am, is the minimum amount of work i can do to get paid enough to cover our bills and, combined with Micks wages, leave us enough to live comfortably. Some weeks, maybe, not even comfortably - just to make ends meet. So even though i'm not looking forward to it, even though i'll miss my little bubba and i might miss one of his huge milestones ( and i'll be incredibly upset and guilty if that does happen ... ) i recognise that i HAVE to go back to work, for the good of my family. Its that whole unselfish, sacrificing mother thing - despite what i really would like to do, i know that sucking it up and just getting in there and doing is going to be what benefits us most.
Lets just hope i can last more than a week before i get the shits with someone....
Mp3Juice
5 months ago
Good luck tomorrow!
ReplyDeleteThe first week is rough. I give you permission to kick scream and cry and pout like a toddler when you have to leave the house...that's what I did ;)
ReplyDeleteGood luck!!
I didn't go back to work until Ethan was 8 months old, and Claire was the same age when I went to work after she was born. This time I'm lucky enough that David and I have worked it out so I can stay home. But those first two times, I cried. A lot. I didn't want to go. It gets easier though. Good luck tomorrow.
ReplyDeleteIt will be hard. I had to go back to work 1 month after giving birth. That was way hard, but at least I was leaving the kids with my hubby.
ReplyDeleteGood luck, take kleenix
Hope your first day back goes well, Amy!
ReplyDeleteGood luck!! Even though I'm not a mom, I totally understand where you're coming from. But, the time you get to spend with him will be all that more precious!!
ReplyDeleteHope all goes well.
hope you survived your first day back and have a good week xx
ReplyDelete