Purely Confident-ial

I dont think its any secret that i've been suffering from a slight crisis of confidence lately - last weeks massive freakout/depressive episode is evidence enough. And though i have a pretty great life at the moment - wonderful husband and son, pregnant, relatively steady income stream - i'm still letting those old feelings of inadequacy be stirred up ( definately prompted by the grand dumping by my ex-best friend back in late 2010 ). I dont know why i'm aware enough to know whats bugging me and why, but not be able to stop it. Bah - the curse of an ( apparently ) intelligent woman!

hate cats - love this pic....

Anyhoodle, along with the awareness of the loss of confidence, there is also - this time - the realisation that there are small things that i can do to make myself feel better. I'm not talking about the big things like actually asking for help instead of doing everything on my own, i'm talking about the little things that can make a frumpy mum feel like a woman again, or a housewife feel like a rockstar.Things like:

* paint my nails - because of the work i do ( using heat and small handtools ) my nails always look crappy. But even a coat of barely there blush pink makes me feel a bit more flash, and a little less " Flashdance ";
* wear red - i always, always, always feel better in red! If i'm feeling particularly faboosh, no doubt i will end up gravitating towards something red, whether its a red cardy, a red dress or my favourite red flats ( which are currently dying. Sad face ).
* put on make up - i know this one is pretty basic for most women but i dont wear a whole lot of makeup. Even as a teenage girl it was a basic foundation and mascara, i never really bothered to learn about liquid eyeliner/bronzer/whatever all that goop is i see plastered on young girls today. For the last few months all i've worn to work is tinted moisturiser and thats it, but now in the first few weeks pregnancy my skin went off the rails and i found i was really bothered by the ruddiness and pimples, pimples and more pimples! So i've invested in some " Nude by Nature " mineral foundation and plan on wearing it everyday. I dont have a lot of time, especially on workdays, so a mineral foundation that i can just brush on and go sounds perfect to me!
* Catch up with friends - i need to this more often as spending time with people who like me FOR me reminds me that i am not the sum of what one person thinks of me. Unfortunately, the two good friends i have left from school are not always ready available ( one lives in another town now, and the other is a competitive horse rider and is off at competitions a lot ), so i need to either find some new friends or make the most of the opportunities i do have with my girls.

So my mission in the next 25 weeks - while i slowly turn into a human blimp but before a newborn baby ties me to the house for a while - is to make an effort to brighten my own life, and to disregard those people and thoughts that are trying to bring me down!