Thursday, November 18, 2010

Opinions - Please?Please?Please!

Ok - so remember a while back when i said i would like to write a childrens book one day? Yea well, i need your help on something. See, inspired by my son dumping one of his toys in the bath a few nights ago i sat down and wrote myself a little story entitled " There's a Giraffe in my Bath ". I've read it to a few people and one in particular encouraged me to see if i could get it published. I laughed it off but she said to me " Amy, if i can change careers in my mid-30's, a widow and a mum of 3....YOU can be a writer ". Fair enough. Unfortunately, there is already a childrens picture book called " A Giraffe In The Bath " ( by the very talented Mem Fox, which as far as i can tell isnt like mine at all, just shares a first line ) but i thought i might just post my little effort here and see what you beautiful mummy type people thought of it. Here goes:

There’s a giraffe in my bath

He’s quite big and tall
With him already in
I’ll have no room at all!

I scrub his long neck
And clean under his chin
Then he moves over a little
So I can get in.

I slide in with a “splash! “,
Settle down in my bath
I’m a little bit squished
Up against this giraffe.

The water is warm
And there’s plenty of bubbles
But if mum catches us both
We’ll be in big troubles!

“ Could you pass me the soap? “
I ask with a smirk.
A bath with a giraffe
Is such difficult work!

I have a quick scrub and
Get as clean as I can
But a big, tall giraffe
Wasn’t part of the plan!

Its time to get out
Before the water goes cold
“ You have to go now “
The giraffe is told.

He stands up and climbs out
And he shakes himself dry
And off into the night
Goes that strange giraffe guy.

I smile and laugh
Cant help shaking my head;
I’m done in the bath,
But now who’s in my bed?

So there you go...thats it. If you could give a quick opinion on it, and maybe link it on your blog so i can get as mnay opinions as possible, i would be really really appreciative!


  1. Love it! Take it further and get it in print.

  2. Absolutely fantastic - do it, send it to a publisher - they can only say no, but they might just say yes!

  3. I bet a children's publisher would love this.

  4. As a mom of four I can tell you it would be a hit in my house. Very cute! I was imaging all the possible illustrations to go along with it in my head and made myself laugh!

  5. Oh wow that is great! I read it to my nephew and he wanted to see the giraffe and asked me to read it again to him 3 times so I am writing this in between! LOL

  6. I love it! Had a chuckle at the end - the parents would like it as well.

  7. Dudette, that is A-W-E-S-O-M-E! Sounds just the kinds of stories we love to read in this household :)

  8. I think it is a great story and would be a hit in any home..mine included :)

  9. Hi found you via FYBF ... its been tried and tested my daughter thought it was awesome...she said Mommy can we get that book... I said yes when its printed... do it follow your dreams....

  10. You are very talented! Great rhythm - the only place that tripped me up was the "there's plenty of bubbles..." maybe because it should be "there ARE" - how about "And so full of bubbles." ? Just a suggestion! My girls would love this. Send away! (:

  11. Wow - thank you so much everybody! Its fantastic to know that other people are liking it, and especially that other peoples kids are into it!

  12. ADORABLE! I really pictured the whole story in my head! Children will love it!
    I'm a new follower.

  13. OMG. That is sooooo brilliant! I absolutely adore cute rhyming stories that make kids giggle! Go for it, I'd buy it :)