Monday, November 28, 2011

Mothers Helper

I read a very interesting article in this months Madison magazine, about mothers using alcohol as a coping mechanism to make it through the day. It seemed, to the author, that there is a growing number of mums who use the reward of a glass of wine at the end of the day as a way to make through the muck and mire that can be day-to-day child-rearing.

Baby's screaming and the toddler is drawing on the walls? Its ok, i can have a wine soon. No-ones done any homework, dinner is nowhere near ready and 3 kids still need to have a bath? No worries, i can crack open a nice red as soon as they're asleep.

I guess what the question the article was posing is a) when did this become the stressed-out mummy norm? and b) is it really acceptable, and where do we draw the line?

I am not a big drinker at all - yes i got myself merrily sloshed at my recent wedding, and shared a bottle of wine with my new husband a few nights on our honeymoon, but before that the most i'd had to drink in over a year was 3 glasses of wine at my hens party. Despite doing the typical teenage thing and getting drunk at the pub of a weekend ( which i gave up pretty early on - kept up the clubbing, but spent my nights dancing with a can of Coke in my hand ), i've never really understood the compulsion to drink. Maybe its because i'm yet to find a bevvie that just really hits the palate so well that i MUST have it, but i dont "get" the need for a wine/beer/Breezer after a long day. Especially when this need becomes not one glass a few nights a week but 3 or 4 glasses EVERY night.

I dont want you to think i'm passing judgment - unless this compulsion becomes full-blown alcoholism i dont see anything wrong with a tipple or two, i just dont "get " it. Kind of the same way my mum doesnt "get " blogging, or my brother doesnt understand my very real and deep love for " That 70's Show ".

Maybe i'm boring, but my preferred form of escapsim after a stressful day of Flynn-related craziness is to relax with a book, to escape into someone elses life for a half hour or so, and forget about the massive tantrum thats just been thrown or how many dirty nappies i've changed that day.

So is it just me - is a drink after the kids bedtime the best way to relax? Is there something i'm missing?


  1. Up until the other day which I blogged about, Ive never felt the need to end a bad day with alcohol, but that day I just needed it and it was gooood!!I remember my mum always ended her day with a wine as did friends mothers so I really don't think that it is anything new? To be honest I love a drink, but I love it as a wind down and when relaxing with friends, I usually cannot think of anything worse after a hard day with the boys.

  2. I do get it but it's not something that happens here. Neither Rich or I drink as alcohol has been issue in the past, so this has to be how it is for us. But I do understand wanting to take the edge off. Greatly.

    I think alcohol is so socially acceptable that it's almost expected that once the kids are in bed the bottle is opened. You see wine o'clock being announced on Twitter and can almost hear the sigh of relief in some cases (again, no judgement, just an observation). I think when you know that there is something that can blur the edges a little it is so tempting to reach for the glass for an easy fix and there really is no problem with that. As long as that's not the only way someone knows how to relax. I'm in danger of writing an essay so will leave it there. Interesting!