Wednesday, June 4, 2008

I have to find a man outlet - fast!

I have an inappropriate crush on a bank teller. There you go, i'm putting it out there - i have a crush. Not one of those school girl crushes where you write the guys name all over your school books and follow him around making puppy dog eyes. No, this one is more a dirty, perverted type of thing. Don't look at me like that - girls are allowed to have those kinds of crushes too. See, there is a young guy who works at the bank across from my work. I say young because he's probably around 19 years old - approximately 5 years younger than my good self. This young bank teller has the biggest hands i've ever seen. Seriously, he's not absurdly tall but he's built like a football player and he has enormous hands. Strong hands. Manly hands. So, for stories sake, lets call him Banky McHands.

Anyhoo, Banky McHands has these big, strong, manly hands. I know for a fact, seeing as i used to go to the same gym as him, that these big, strong, manly hands lead up to big, strong, well muscled arms. Thats my thing, you see - just like some men are boob guys, or some women fall head over heels for that V thing some guys have at the hip ( incidentally.... yum ), i'm an arm girl. I like guys with well cut arms, arms that look like they could alternately pick you up and hold you against a wall or wrap themselves around you until you fall asleep. So here's Banky McHands with his big hands and muscular arms and here's me, every time i've been to the bank for the last few weeks, subtlely watching his hands move and wondering how well he can use them. Don't look at me like that either - you catch my drift.

But its getting worse - i discovered, in a brief lapse of focus, that Banky McHands has a really good bum. I'd say arse, but thats makes me sound even more horny, perverted and desperate than i already am. I'm now alternating between daydreams about how much use i could put those big hands to, and visions of his bare bum as he rolls out of bed. Good lord child, i have issues.

A woman cant help developing inappropriate crushes on well cut bank tellers when she hasnt had a man to speak of for quite a while. Can she? Seriously, quit looking at me like that....


  1. SEE, Now you have a reason for the skimpy undies! Put em to use and give him what for!!!!
    And quit explaining yourself! No need to apologise for having human needs.

  2. Ha ha this post made me laugh quite hard. I had a similar crush on my local barista...

  3. Well i'm glad i can amuse you Em... and welcome!

  4. I'm with you!!! We can eye up who we like . . . and it's not like he isn't LEGAL!!! :)