Tuesday, July 6, 2010

An Update ( For Those Who Have Actually Noted My Absence )

Nope - i havent fallen off the face of the earth. And no, unlike my last lengthy absence, i havent given birth again ( i'm not a miracle worker ). Nope, i've just had a fussy son who refuses to sleep the way i'd like him too and just not enough extra time up my sleeve.

See - remember Project SleepyTime ? Its  not going so well. Its been put on the backburner, for now. I thought we were making some headway after a week or so of going through the motions, but as we got better at our day sleeps, the nights were starting to get worse. Not that they were good - waking two or three times a night, sometimes taking an hour and half to go back to sleep - but they were getting markedly worse. And then, there was last Monday night - Flynn woke at 9:45pm and did not fall back to sleep until 4:10am. 6 hrs - and he whinged and cried and screamed the entire time. I became hysterical, crying and crying and pleading with him to be quiet. I almost took myself out of the house to just sit somewhere away from him, except that it was -4 degrees outside and i didnt want to risk frostbite. I took his temperature three times and it was normal. I gave him Nurofen because i thought it might have been his teeth ( it wasnt and the medecine did nothing ). Mick and i rocked and walked and patted and stroked.... nothing.I got so desperate i rang a medical helpline who, despite the lack of symptoms, suggested i take him to the local ER because he'd been crying consistently for more than 2 hours. As soon as i put him in the car and started driving, he laughed and giggled ( i drove for five minutes and then went home ). Finally, after 6 hours of crying and over an hour of me lying beside him and stroking his head, Flynn finally fell asleep. And so did i, on the mattress beside him, utterly exhausted - only for him to wake at his normal time of 7am, which meant i was existing on 3 hours sleep.

The next night he woke at 11pm and it took me and hour and half of cuddles and stroking to get him asleep. The night after that, when he woke at 8pm, i nursed him on my lap until Mick and i were ready for bed, and then put him in bed with us. Which is where he has stayed the rest of the week. Its only been a few days and i'm already over co-sleeping. We have a queen sized bed but i'm all cramped and my back has been killing me because i dont have the room to roll over properly ( and i spend the first few hours twisted at the waist with my arm slung across my son. ) Somehow Flynn knows if i;m not touching him, which is half the problem - you think he's asleep, he's snoring and all limp and then, as soon as i place him in his bed and my hand leaves the back of his head BOOM! his eyes open and he starts sooking. He doesnt calm down til his back in my arms or back in my bed. Its driving me mental.

So, to clarify, i have been missing in action for the past week because my normal blogging timeslot has been taken up with nursing, rocking, patting , stroking and trying to get some sleep. As we speak, Flynn is asleep beside me on a mattress on the loungeroom floor ( it looks like squatters have taken over my living room ) with his feet touching my leg. I am toying with the idea of putting him in his cot and just seeing how long he;ll stay asleep. I'm thinking an hour at the most, at which point he'll wake up and i, out of frusturation and exhaustion, will bring him to bed with us.

Any advice people?


  1. Your son sounds exactly like mine. Same night-time sleep patterns and everything. My son's problem was a yeast infection (candida) in the gut.

    A good kinesiologist would be able to tell you if he has it. Get them to check for food intolerances, too, because they are a common side-effect of candida.

    Does he have a red bottom, or nappy rash that keeps coming back? (a symptom of candida) if so, it will be making him itch during the night, which adds to his woes. (He'll also have pains in the tummy, and always seems to be at specific times of the night)

    You can get probiotics specially for children, that you can mix in with his formula, or solids. It will probably take a couple of weeks before you notice any difference.

    Don't expect your doctor to diagnose candida. They don't seem to believe in it...

    For some reason, it seems to affect night-time sleeping, but not so much daytime sleeping.

    Good luck. I remember exactly how hard it is.

  2. Shit, sounds awful.

    Does he have a good bedtime routine? He probably does, but it may be worth revisiting. My little guy seems to like the following:

    play (a little - nothing too hectic)
    wrap, lights out, kiss forehead, lights out

    Also, I've found baths work really well. If he's hysterical, then go for a middle-of-the-night bath just to chill him out. And maybe put some lavendar drops inside - it is meant to facilitate sleep.

    Also, if you're desperate, maybe just drive around. We did that once when my then-14 mo daughter went nuts in the middle of the night when we were in Europe. It too helped chill her out.

    This too will pass. It always does. Good luck. Sleeplessness is shitty.

    x P23

  3. Oh dear. That sux so much hun. No advice here, I'm afraid. have you tried giving Karitane a call? Google them , they are a bit help. other than that, just a massive *hug* and a lot of sympathy.

  4. I co-sleep with Grayson because it is the only way I will get any sleep. He's 8 months old. Claire and Ethan were both out of the bassinet in our room and in their own cribs at 4 months. Grayson slept in the bassinet 3 times. We put him in the crib once and he actually screamed. Driving him around makes him cry more. I'm so tired.

  5. I've been wondering where you were! It sounds like you're going through a really rough time. I'm sorry, I have no advice for you, our situation isn't that much better than yours. All I can say is what people say to me, hang on, it will pass and make sure you're telling people if it's getting a bit much and you need a break. Is your Dad still coming to take Flynn for a walk?

  6. @katie - i've never heard of that, so it may be something to look into.
    @twenty three - we have a good bedtime routine, and he has little trouble falling asleep by 7pm. Trouble is he still wants to fall asleep in my arms and then he wakes after being in his cot for about an hour.
    @Lori - thanks for the cyber hug!
    @Chantal - i've commented on your blog that i feel like i know what your going through. Sounds like you have it worse though, so cyber hugs to you...
    @Pumpkin - yep, Dad is still taking him for a walk most days. Except that its winter here now so sometimes its too cold, and on those days Flynny gets agitated because he loves going for his walks and is grumpy when poppy doesnt come and get him!

  7. you have ALL my sympathy.
    My last two kids were appalling sleepers. Son slept MAYBE 15 mins at a time during the day, and 3 hours max at night. Daughter was similar.
    As they got older, and dropped daytime sleeps, they slept longer at night but woke 4 or 5 or more times every night, and getting them to sleep in the first place was always a battle.
    Some kids are just poor sleepers.
    You should definitely rule out any medical problems, but it may just be that he's one of 'those' kids.
    Mine grew out of it before 3 years old.
    Not comforting, I know.

  8. You poor love, sleep deprivation is a form of torture :| I don't really have any advice, I've blogged many times about our issues. We've done a stint at Karitane and then coslept for many months- with Manchild on the lounge.It WON'T last forever though, you WILL come out on the other side. Just remind yourself of that when times are tough x

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  11. bless your heart. that is miserable. I don't have any advice. some of the other advice posted is worth a shot though (bath, feeding, etc)

  12. I've been away from blog reading for a while, I'm just catching up.
    Sorry to hear about your sleep issues, I wish I had some advice for you. Hopefully as I catch up on reading I'll see that things have improved for you since this post...