Big Brother: Part 1

One thing i have been pondering over with this pregnancy so far ( aside from names, birth options, scans etc ) is how Flynn is going to go as a big brother. There is no doubt in my mind that we will have an initial period where he turns completely feral and refuses to co-operate. Hell, if he' anything like i was as an eldest child he'll probably have at least one attempt at killing his new sibling ( I'm joking - pushing your new brother off his change table isnt enough to kill them. Believe me, i tried! ). I'm hoping though that the transition from " only child " to " big brother " is relatively smooth.

Can you imagine this truck driving little grub as a big brother?

Flynn is so gorgeous with other people babies. Even though he's still a little shorty, he bends down to talk to babies and talks in this cute little baby voice. He asks if he can give them a cuddle or " pat " them, and when he does he strokes their little heads so gently it makes me smile. For such a rough monkey of a boy, he's incredibly sweet and gentle with people smaller than himself. ( This gentleness, however, does not yet extend to pregnant mothers. He's still happy to climb all over me ). It almost makes me proud that he's so aware of how to behave around babies, and especially proud of how protective he is towards them. Of course i know that it will be a bit different when the baby is living in his house, stealing away his mums attention, but i still have this inkling that the inherent gentleness and protectiveness will be there.

We've already explained to him what it means to be the big brother. It means he has to help us look after the baby, to give it lots of cuddles and kisses to keep it safe; it means he gets to move on to more " big boy " things and he can pass his baby stuff on to his new brother/sister; and it means he has to show the baby how to be a good boy or girl. Though i'm not expecting smooth sailing right from the outset, i have no doubt Flynn will be able to do all that. He may be a total dude, but he's a pretty caring little fellow when it comes down to it.

So at this point, with 15-ish weeks down and 24-ish weeks to go, i'm just going to keep on talking about babies and families and changes with Flynn, and hope that when push comes to shove its actually more of a cuddle than anything else.

What about you - for those who have more than one child, how did your eldest cope with becoming a sibling?

Meditating on friends, family and, uh.... meditation.

Ommmm #1: My mother and I went to a free meditation course on Saturday morning. Although its something I'm into, I really only went as moral support for my mum. Frankly, I'm not sure whether i enjoyed it or not, but I'm pretty sure I'm not going back. Now, I'm a pretty hippy-dippy person but this, this was a bit much. Firstly, it was recommended that when meditating at home you set up a candle next to a picture of the meditations teacher. Nope , not for me - thats like setting someone up as a God or a guru, and i dont do that. Secondly, when meditating you were supposed to be focusing on the divine feminine energy , or kundalini, within us all. Rather than quietly, inwardly, wordlessly focusing, we were supposed to be inwardly repeating affirmations, such as " Mother Kundalini, am i the spirit ? Mother Kundalini, I am the spirit ". See, once you give something a name and begin talking to it, its too much like praying for me. If there is one thing i dont do, its pray. So i think its safe to say that the mediation session was not for me. Which is not to say meditation itself is not for, just not this particular style.

Ommmm #2: My brother is so funny when he's pissy. He came round for dinner last night after having been at a bbq at a mates place all afternoon, and he'd had enough beer that he was in the state of " happiness " where you talk really fast, and you're face is kind of flushed and you find stuff really funny. We were playing a general knowledge trivia game and he's just blurting out the answers regardless of whether it was his turn or not. They werent the right answers, mind you - thats what made it funny. I think it might have answered maybe three questions correctly the whole game, but he never made it past the third square on the board. He kept landing on the " Move back three spaces " square, and having to go back to the start, every time expressing his mock disgust and saying how much this game sucked and we were all cheaters - and then bursting into laughter. Stupid, stupid, drunk child.

Ommmm #3: My two and half year old neice called me her " beautiful girl ". As in " Bye Aunty Amy, my beautiful girl! " Awwwwwwwwwww. Someone loves me.

Ommmmm #4: Remember the debacle with Mary and her sister? Her sister who was one of my best friends and that i felt completely betrayed by, to the point where I questioned the existence of the relationship in the future ? Yea, well I've hardly heard from her since she moved towns. She's been back a handful of times and she's promised each time " Hey, I'll come round and see you! ". And, each time, there has been an excuse and she hasnt shown up. This weekend just gone she was supposed to be back in town and we were going to go out for drinks and dance and guess what ? I didnt hear from her. Not even an " Oh, I cant make it excuse " - i just flat out didnt hear from her at all. Whatevs.

Ommmm #5: Today is Monday and tonight was the first night in two weeks that I have been to the gym. Frankly, I missed it. I'd been dying of the lurgy for almost a full two weeks and was just too tired and run down to do anything other than lie on my lounge reading a magazine or watching the Olympics ( gold everywhere for the Australians today..... boo yeah! ), so i didnt bother wrecking myself at the gym. But i really did miss the routine of it, and I have to admit i felt absolutely freaking fantastic after my workout tonight.

Everyone knows a woman glows more after a good workout, covered in sweat and cheeks flushed.....