Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Wasted Weekend

I have a confession to make, ahead of next weeks Operation Slimdown update - i had a BAD weekend. As in everything was bad... i got upset, i lazed around the house like a sad sack, i didnt eat much but what i did eat was junk, and rather than water i crammed myself full of Pepsi Max. The only vegetables i ate on Sunday were mushrooms ( on a pizza ) and potato ( wedges, with a steak sandwich ). By Sunday evening i was a bit disgusted in myself - although my mood had cheered up somewhat, thanks to a series of very farty-sounding raspberries blown on my arm by Flynn ( farty sounds are funny! ). I'm not trying to make excuses by pre-empting my expected low weight loss for the fortnight with this post - i think i'm just trying to let myself know its ok to slip up. Especially when all you want to do is curl up in a ball and sob.


What was wrong with me, your wondering? In retrospect, i probably could have manned-up a bit and not gotten so terribly upset but..... my mum let slip to my sister that she will be bridesmaid at my wedding. Why is that so bad? Because I HADNT ASKED HER YET. I soooo wanted the whole asking thing to be a special moment between my sister and i - i had planned to invite her around for dinner and ask, and let her have her " wow - really? " moment.... but now i cant, because my mother quite oftens suffers from Mouth Before Brain Syndrome. That is, she doesnt think before she speaks. So, without thinking, my mother blurts out to my sister " Oh, Amy made the hair appointment for us the morning of the wedding ", which got a death stare from me and a " Why would i be getting my hair done with her ? " from my sister. Now, my sister may be blonde but she's not entirely stupid, so she knows that the only people who get their hair done with the bride are the brides mother.... and the bridesmaids. Light bulb comes on for my sister, my mothers brain engages at the same moment and she realises what she's done, and my death stare turns to evil eye with angry pout. Not.Happy. Mum.

Suffice to say i eventually burst into tears and had to be comforted by my dad, who assured me that although my mother has frequent brain farts like that, she never actually means to ruin or offend. So not the point though - my special moment is gone, my sisters is gone, and now i cant unask her, can i? ( Not that i wanted to, but there may be complications with the best man which would have made it easier to have no attendants at all. Too late now... ). So i spent the entirety of the rest of the weekend in a funk, alternately pouting and weeping, and paying no attention to what i was putting in my mouth. Boo hoo me....

Friday, February 11, 2011

Polly Dolly - Be My Valentine?

So after posting my very own personal Polyvore sets on Thursday, i go to my reader last night to find... that Danimezza has issued this weeks Polly Dolly challenge - which was go head over to Polyvore and show us how you'd dress for your lover of choice on Valentines Day.....

Polly Dolly - Be My Valentine?


Now seeing as i'd already shown you an evening look with a red dress, i couldnt just do the same thing over - so i went with a plum coloured ( which i've always been complimented on when wearing ) dress, which is soft and floaty and girly for the imaginary Valentines dinner we would be going ( in reality, Mick and i are forgoing a dinner out on Valentines Day, and are instead going out to see Jimeon on the 19th ). I've gone with neutral heels to lengethn my (short) legs and some fun jewellery. And for some more fun, after the dinner? Lacy Elle Macpherson lingerie....

Thursday, February 10, 2011

My Own Personal Polyvore

I was really looking forward to this weeks Polyvore challenge and then... its missing! Danni hasnt made her post yet so i thought i'd do my own challenge. I'd seen a few posts this morning in regards to personal style, so i thought i'd create two sets for myself - the first being my typical day time style, and the second what i would wear on a special, night time, occasion. First up: Daytime.

Daytime Me

Please note the awesome Chuck Taylor All-stars and the requesite bootleg jeans. I always bootlegs because i'm quite short and a bit curvy, so i find bootlegs balance me out. Complete the outfit with a cute t-shirt ( thats a Green Day t-shirt - Green Day rock! ), a comfy cardi and my watch and i'm ready to hit the shops, take Flynn to the park or lounge around at home.
Ah, special occasion - like going out for dinner with Mick or a party. You may be able to tell that my favourite colour to wear is red, which is why i picked this dress ( its actually very similar in style to one i had made for myself in Vietnam - half a dozen more kilos of weight loss and i might fit back into it! ). I also love a high heel and i think the studs on these ones are sexy. As far as make up, i'm an eye girl.... i dont do lips. Its mascara and eyeliner all the way baby!
So there you be - i'm not quite sure what you'd call my style ( any ideas ? ) but those are representative of what i would normally choose to wear. How about you? Do you have a personal style, or a style that you would aspire to ?

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Operation Slimdown Update

So after yesterdays ranting and raving its time again for my fortnightly " Operation Slimdown " update. So a bit of sunshine compared to yesterdays rain... oh yea, sunshine means another good result! After last fortnights huge 3.7kg loss ( which still has me smiling my head off ) i was hoping for anothe loss, but not expecting anything as massive. Another 3ish kilos would have been nice but i accidentally   stuffed myself with a huge bowl of pasta on my birthday, and indulged a bizarre craving for Maccas the next weekend. So yea, i kind of played up a little compared to my insane strictness of the previous fortnight - but i'm okay with that. I re-introduced small portion of carbs and have been sticking with the at least 2 cups of vegies and 2l of water a day. So how did i go?
Bust: 94.5cm - up 1.5cm
Waist: 77cm - down 1.5cm
Hips: 99cm - down 2cm
Bum: 104.5 cm - up 0.5cm
Thigh: 65.5 - no change
Weight: 73.3kg  - down 800gms
Ok , so it looks a bit all over the place but i think the bust measurement can be attributed to womanly fluctutaions and a slightly padded bra, and the 0.5cm in the bum is pretty negligent ( and probably a slight variance in wear the tape was sitting as compared to last time ). And i'm happy with 800gms - i'm hoping to be able to do 1kg a fortnight til i reach my goal, and 800gms is not far off. And considering the pasta and Maccas binge, and not having added any exercise in yet ( through sheer laziness and a desire to NOT run myself ragged in 40 degree temperatures ), i'm ok with falling 200gms short of my goal.
So, overall, a happy result. And almost ( half a kilo short ) halfway there!

Monday, February 7, 2011

Give Me A Break!

Seriously, it seems like Mick and I can not win a bloody trick. Its no secret that we are trying to save for our wedding ( even though my mum and dad are paying for quite a bit ) but just in the last month or so its seems like every second day i'm opening another bill and we just aren't making any ground on anything.
Last week i paid the car insurance ( after driving around for a month uninsured because we couldnt afford it ) and over the next two weeks we have to pay the quarterly installment of our rates. We're also expecting this quarters electricity bill this week and today i come home to find I owe the Goverment $560 in overpayment of Family Tax Benefit. And those are on top of two mortgages ( Mick bought a property in a small country town before we met and we are trying to sell it ), the groceries and childcare each week. I dont mean to whinge, because i know there are people out there who are far worse off than us, but its just so frusturating.
I opened that bill today and just wanted to burst into tears - over $2000 ( roughly ) of bills due within a four week period on top of regular expenses. I already try to buy the cheapest groceries possible, and have stopped buying my lunch once a week in an effort to save money. I dont go to beauty salons, i only have my hair cut 4 times a year, and havent bought new clothes with my own money for 6 months or more. All this, and i'm still having to dip into meagre savings to pay bills on time. For God's sake - when are we ever going to catch a break and get ahead!?!?

Ok. Sorry. Just needed to get that out. Rant over.

Thursday, February 3, 2011

Polly Dolly

So, this is my first ever time playing along with Danimezza's weekly Polly Dolly challenge - and i have to admit, i'm both a bit excited and nervous for people to see my results! I've always wanted to take part but never really had the time up my sleeve but today i took the challenge and had a bit of fun. This week Dani wants us to know if we had our favourite celebrity for the day, how would we dress them?
Polly Dolly
And there it, my first Polly Dolly outfit for the gorgeous Audrey Tatou. I couldnt pinpoint just one favourite celeb so i went with Audrey because i like her style. I see Audrey wearing this down to a cafe for a croissant and a coffee with some friends. I think French woman have a simple, clean-lined style ( hence the typically French striped boatneck top... ), but, like her character in " Amelie " i thought Audrey would appreciate a few quirky, cute additions, such as the double strand of cherry bracelets, the ruffles on the flats and the bow worn pinned to her beret. I also went with a Chanel fragrance in homage to her having played Coco Chanel on film, but went with Chance, which is quite a sweet, playful scent.
So - how did i do for me first effort?

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Sabotage

I feel like i'm being my own worst enemy lately. Sabotaging myself. Let me give you an example:
I was invited to a 30th birthday party for one of the mums from my mothers group, this past Saturday night. I decided not to go. Why? Because they had forgotten to tell me and one other mum the plans for the weeks meet up until 2 hrs before the actual get-together and i felt like an outsider; and because if i went alone ( Mick wasnt feeling well ) and i was excluded how hurt would i be? I just wasnt willing to put myself out there, and on Saturday night, i thought that was the best decision. Now? I'm not so sure.

" Sabotage " by the Beasty Boys - now thats funky...

I dont think its any secret that i have trust issues, and after the whole being "defriended " affair of late last year, i dont see these issues dissipating anytime soon. In fact, they've only gotten worse. I was thinking about it the other morning ( in the shower mind you, because its about the only alone time i get... ) and i think i definately sabotaged myself Saturday night. I talked myself out of going because of what i imagined would happen. Truth be told, i would probably have known at least half a dozen women there, and i would have had a really great time. But in my head, i couldnt put myself out there and trust that it would all work out. I.Just.Couldn't.Do.IT.

If i put myself out there again, and try and trust someone, to know the real me, to become a proper friend.... i run the risk of being dumped. Again. I dont know, right now, whether i'm willing to put myself through this again....